All tagged blocking money

How Financial Trauma Affects Our Finances

At least 80% of my financial life and my relationship with money has been influenced by events in my teen years.

When I was 13, my mom’s fancy car (she had 2 cars) got repossessed because she had an outstanding bill of R2000/ US$150 that she couldn’t pay.

She was only left with 1 installment and she couldn’t pay it.

This was the first time I realized that my mother was running out of money.

It was also the first time I became aware that money could run out and that felt strange to me.

My mom had spent most of her life making sure that we never wanted for anything, so up until this point, I didn’t know that a person could run out of money.

The trauma of watching my mom lose her car has stayed with me and has influenced the way I buy cars.

I’ve owned several cars in several different countries and have always bought all my cars cash.

I paid cash for all my cars, even when I was drowning in debt.

It’s never crossed my mind to buy a car any other way, in fact, the thought of having a car installment sends me into a state of panic.

Why We Block Ourselves From Receiving or Making Money

I worked 3 jobs to pay for my undergrad at the University of Cape Town (UCT).

My mom was unemployed and had no money and my uncle was going through financial difficulties.

My dad could have helped me pay for university but we’d had a fight about something (can’t remember what) in my first year and I was proving a point that I didn’t need him in my life.

And since he was the only adult who could help me; I ended up working 3 jobs to pay my bills.

I won’t lie, times were hard - I barely had money for food (I would skip meals to save money for rent and transport) and was always sleep deprived.

At some point, one of my friends forced me to go to the financial aid office to ask for help and it turned out that I was on the Dean’s List and was able to get a little bit of funding for my studies.

My friends had to beg me to take money from my mother and to apply for a student loan.

I only took the money from my mom because I was at the end of my tether; I remember feeling so ashamed that I took money from my mom, like I’d failed in some way.

Even in all my financial struggles, I had a very hard time receiving money.

This inability to receive money and allow money into my life has been one of my greatest entrepreneurial challenges.

It was a huge contributor to the collapse of my first business because it’s not enough to ask for money from clients and the universe, you also need to be energetically open to receive the money you asked for.