Correlation Between Time, Money and Systemic Oppression
I often see posts that say that people who are late, don't respect your time and don't respect physical boundaries and I think we need to start talking more about the intersectionality of systemic oppression, time and money.
I am still shook by this gross generalization of assuming people are being disrespectful when they are tardy.
1. The link between time and systemic oppression
The best way to explain this is with an example.
Imagine I’m a new graduate and I live alone in a fancy neighborhood, close to all the corporate offices; I work at those offices and have a car because my parents can afford to supplement my rent because they have money.
Now imagine I have a friend, who lives in a different neighborhood, 30 mins drive by car from work, she has no car and has to take public transport to work. She doesn't live alone, there are other people in the house who also have to get ready for work in the mornings so sometimes the bathroom setup isn’t ideal.
Some days my friend makes it to work on time, other days there are things outside of her control - taxi/train drama etc.
But no matter what, she finds a way to get to work.
I’m often early or on time for work and for all social engagements and my friend is always late and is told she is disrespecting boundaries and others.
Is this true?
Why is this about her being disrespectful to others?
And of course, when it comes to her quarterly review, she’s judged on this and told she’s not serious about her job.
They also point out how she never shows up for after work events and always needs to leave early, which she does because…public transport and walking around at night as a woman.
But her managers don’t know about any of this and she is seen as not serious about her career and not appreciative of her job.
Again is any of this true?
I’d argue that my friend is more aware of time than I am because so many of her resources are time constrained.
In South Africa and the USA, this is literally how White privilege buys time and gets rewarded over and over.
2. There’s a con-relation between time and money because having money can buy you resources, which frees up time
Imagine 2 women - one White and one Black, both of them have small kids and both work at the same company with kids that go to the same school.
The White woman has a live-in nanny, a helper and a gardener and lives close to the school (a common situation in South Africa).
Her nanny gets the kids ready for school, the helper cleans and even cooks, every morning, things are getting done. They live near the good schools so the nanny walks the kids to school. She hops in her car and goes to work.
She arrives at work on time, gets to make small talk, gets to be seen by the managers and network with them. She goes to a few of the after work engagements.
She’s seen as serious about her job and hard working because she is so good about time and the managers remember her and know her.
The Black woman, has a helper who also doubles up as a nanny, but her money isn’t just for her, family members need help because apartheid and colonization are the gifts that keep on giving.
Anyway, she’s also economical and lives in a different neighborhood, not close to the school, so her nanny can't walk the kids to school, she (the woman) has to drive them to school and then go to work.
Sometimes she just makes it on time or is late so she goes straight to her desk and doesn't know the managers on a personal level.
But she is labeled as disrespectful of boundaries and time and not serious about her career.
Again: Is this true?
Anyway, based on all this, the Black woman is penalized during bonius time and is told she isn't serious about work.
Most days she can't make it to after work engagements because she has to pick up kids since they can't walk home.
But after a while she is seen as lazy because she won't make even one late meeting or after work engagements.
Her perceived work ethic matters more than the actual work she does.
Two guesses who gets promoted and is rewarded with even more money and a title based on her "work ethic"?
3. We need to stop making time about respect because we don’t all have the same hours in a day
So much of people's behavior has little to do with us and sometimes people are tardy for things, and it has zero to do with us.
Not as an F you to us, but because they’re dealing with life.
Everyone is fighting battles and challenges we know nothing about, but Western culture centers the individual in everything, which convinces us that a person's behavior either compliments or insults us in some way.
And this is also why Black and Brown people are seen as lazy or not being time conscious in many spaces.
And before anyone responds and tells me that not all White people have nannies and gardeners, I know this, but please take a moment to reflect on how most traditionally White neighborhoods are located close to amenities and how that affects your ability to get things done quicker.
Reflect on how most financial institutions globally charge White people lower interest rates for loans and mortgages because they are considered “low risk” compared to Black people and then reflect on how that saves you time and money. How that actually frees up money to pay for help and resources.
I haven't even unpacked mental health and tardiness and how when I was depressed I’d make plans and cancel last minute because I was too depressed or anxious to show up.
And how so many people struggle with this and are seen as being disrespectful to the other party’s time, when in that moment, they’re just fighting for their lives or their sanity and aren’t even about being disrespectful.
This is just another reason why I’m so against urgency culture and am in favor of slowing down, breathing and process.
PS: I haven't even unpacked mental health and tardiness and how when I was depressed I would make plans and cancel last minute because I was too depressed or in a panicked state to show up. And how so many people struggle with this and are seen as being disrespectful to the other party’s time, when in that moment, they are just fighting for their lives or their sanity and are not even about being disrespectful.
